Saturday, December 10, 2011

Waiting, Watching, or Walking - Making the Most of My Single Years

We hear so much about "waiting for my future spouse"; however, I think there is so much more to it than just "waiting." In fact as singles, I believe there are three states we can be in - waiting, watching, or walking, but which state is right? Or are they all okay?

Waiting means I am in a state of rest and while we should be content or at rest in Yahweh's hands and His plan for our lives, there is connotation of sitting and "doing nothing but waiting." Should I be sitting and waiting as though my life has no value now as a single? Absolutely not! Our life does not begin when I get married. My life is going on now, and I need to be making the most of it. Some specific charges are given in Scripture - serving our family, serving our congregation, being productive, and being an example or testimony. 1 Timothy 4:15 tells us "Don't let anyone look down on you because of your youth; on the contrary, set the believers an example in your speech, behavior, love, trust and purity." Then in 1 Corinthians 12:14, we are told “And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it: or one member be honored, all the members rejoice with it.” Which means that as part of the body of our physical family and our spiritual family, we need to be involved and part of it. So in the overall picture, we see "waiting" is not a complete picture of where we should be as singles.

Watching is noticing every single species of the opposite sex. Is he the one? He might be! If that is your normal response to any that guy walks by or even gives you a second glance, you are definitely watching! And this goes for guys too! This is very emotionally distracting. You are so busy trying to impress this guy or that girl you miss out on the fun of being a single. You see Yahweh has given us the single years to establish our foundation in Him. Deuteronomy 6:5 says "and you are to love ADONAI your God with all your heart, all your being and all your resources." While we are single, we have the freedom to study, learn, and attend teaching events like we will not have the freedom to do once we are married and have commitments to fulfill. This is a time to enjoy being single and loving our Messiah!

Walking is a state of activity. It means that I am doing something. We are called to be pursuers of God always seeking Him according to Psalm 105:4 "Seek ADONAI and his strength; always seek his presence" and lights unto the world according to Matthew 5:16 "In the same way, let your light shine before people, so that they may see the good things you do and praise your Father in heaven." I need to focus on growing my relationship with Yahweh; then out of that growth, I need to seek to reach others for Yeshua. There are many ways you can do this. First of all, contentment and trust in Yahweh's plan and timing are key. Then doing what Yahweh has called me to is important. For each person, it will be something different. For one, it might be staying at home and serving my family. For another, it might be learning a trade and getting a job in that field. For yet another, it might be serving in a field of ministry. I have found that as I stay focused on what Yahweh has given me to do, it gives me freedom to focus on being the me that I am designed to be. Then in Yahweh's perfect timing, He will bring the perfect spouse into my life, and we will walk together and serve Him. I really love this quote by Dr. Don Raunikar which says “You don’t have to do anything but concentrate on being the right person – the person God wants you to be – instead of finding the right person. Godly marriages are made by first living Godly lives. It is God’s responsibility to whether you will marry and when you will marry. The arrangement is up to Him. How simple…God is [then] the matchmaker.”

So what are you doing right now - Waiting, Watching, or Walking? And what will you do to begin walking if you are not already?

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